O/T How many Christians does it take to change a light bulb?

[Code_Breaker]

Since we are on on the "light bulb" subject, try this one.

 

 

Charismatic: Only one. Hands already in the air.

 

Pentecostals: Ten. One to change the bulb, and nine to pray against the spirit of darkness.

 

Presbyterians: None. Lights will go on and off at predestined times.

 

Roman Catholic: None. Candles only.

 

Baptists: At least 15. One to change the light bulb, and three committees to approve the change and decide who brings the potato salad.

 

Episcopalians: Three. One to call the electrician, one to mix the drinks and one to talk about how much better the old bulb was.

 

Mormons: Five. One man to change the bulb, and four wives to tell him how to do it.

 

Unitarians: We choose not to make a statement either in favor of or against the need for a light bulb. However, if in your own journey you have found that light bulbs work for you, that is fine. You are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your light bulb for the next Sunday service, in which we will explore a number of light bulb traditions including incandescent, fluorescent, three-way, long-life and tinted, all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence.

 

Methodists: Undetermined. Whether your light is bright, dull, or completely out, you are loved. You can be a light bulb, turnip bulb, or tulip bulb. Church-wide lighting service is planned for Sunday. Bring bulb of your choice and a covered dish.

 

Nazarene: Six. One woman to replace the bulb while five men review church lighting policy.

 

Lutherans: None. Lutherans don't believe in change.

 

Amish: What's a light bulb?

 

-author unknown-

 

 

Hope no one was offended. I am a Christian and ROFL . . .

 

Code_Breaker

[Rob B]

It's all good when we make fun of ourselves. As long as it's not at the expence of "Christ", as this wasn't!!!

[Tom Flyer]

Teamsters: Six. "Ya gotta prollem wit' dat?"

[d00d]

Drummers:None, they have a machine that can do that now.

 

Female lead singers: 1, she holds the lightbulb while whole world revolves around her.

 

Guitar PLayers:10, 1 to screw it in and 9 to say thay can do it better.

[jrykrl]

hi-jack

the difference between drummers and drum machines?

You only have to punch the info into the machine once!

Jer teh drummer

[A-ron1286490684]

Hijack +1

 

Did you guys hear the one about the homeless musician?

 

He broke up with his girlfriend...

[d00d]

What do ya call a guy that runs around with a bunch of musicians?....................

 

 

A lead singer

[jrykrl]

How do you know when your singer is at the door?

 

 

He can't find the key, and doesn't know where to come in!

 

Jer teh vocally challenged!!

[P_Scott]

Code,

 

I think the joke got Baptists and Presbyterians mixed up. Pres's love to eat and make lots of committees. Other than that, ROFLMAO.

 

Peter teh Presbyterian on sabatical.

[Scott Bond]

How many wives can a Christian have??

----16----Let's add them up:::

4 richer

4 poorer

4 sick

4 healthy

----------------

16

[Code_Breaker]

quote:

---

Presbyterians: None. Lights will go on and off at predestined times.

---

Peter,

 

I think, but don't hold me to this, one of the Presbyterians basic belief is that everything that happens is spelled out beforehand, hence, the term predestination. Therefore, the light will go on and off at a time already determined, and don't need anyone to do it for them.

 

Remember, this is a joke and besides, the author is unknown. I am just a messenger, and your don't the messenger.

 

 

PS My favorite is the Amish: What's a light bulb?

 

Hey, Scott, I told my wife that I wanted only "4 richer" ones, and my wife said, "You're nuts!" Or did she mean "me?!?"

 

Code_Breaker

[Scott Bond]

quote:

---

Hey, Scott, I told my wife that I wanted only "4 richer" ones, and my wife said, "You're nuts!" Or did she mean "me?!?"

---

Code_Breaker -Maybe she was telling you the price.

[jrykrl]

ROTFLMFAO

Jer teh price!!!

[P_Scott]

Code,

 

I wasn't the messenger. I know you didn't write the joke.

[Code_Breaker]

Peter,

 

I know you were not ing me. Just threw that in cuz it looked good with the

 

 

Code_Breaker